Important Announcment

Guys, Ive got some news and its not too good.

Im sure you've noticed the lag. I take full responsibility. In truth, Im tired. Im burnt out, not just here but basically in everything I do. Most of you know already that Im overworked, Ive been overworked for many years now and Im not going to be working less for the foreseeable future. At one time, I was in every single game on the site, I had more free time at my jobs to apply myself, no more it seems. Now Im only running this game and in Solo's black crusdade game and my presence there has been just as sporadic the last year. Its not just a lack of time, but focus. A few times recently I have postponed updates because I pull up the forums to get something done and then just kinda blank out. I stare at the screen and just feel kind of lost. I guess its like writer's block maybe? But in any case my interest in RPG's has waned as of about 3 years ago in general. Ive been invited to irl sessions on multiple occasions and just have no interest. GM or player doesn't make a difference.

I said this earlier, but this isnt just limited to the site. Ive lost interest in video games, only getting maybe 2-3 hrs of playtime a month and that's usually interrupted time. I used to play a lot of guitar, maybe an hour a day, but now an hour a month is about all I can muster. The list goes on. Ill not bore you with repetitive details. They all amount to the same thing.

So where is this going? Well, Im sorry to say that I just don't have it in me to run the game right now. Im too stubborn and too committed to call it quits, but to continue as I have in the last....6 months at least is not the kind of quality I want to leave behind me. I love what we've built here. I want to play things out, I want everyone's personal stories to come to fruition. I love the attention everyone has given to those personal goals and side quests. But Im not in the right frame to run things. I started this journey on Inq's website (which I just found out is no longer there) close to 10 years ago, longer I think. This was my introduction to pbp rpg and where I made Tomasu. Soon after that Jeff and Mark joined, and we went off to this site when that game died, along with a few others. These characters still have a special place even years after they ceased to roll virtual dice. Greeth, Erradius, Minear, Archimedes, Syl, Bazin and fuckin Toreth, Ruaihdri, Donna,-all names I could not forget, characters not all mine whose personality means something to me. Especially the ones for this game. I brought in many characters and backstories from those other games and even some from an IRL game I was playing back in 2010. It doesn't just die.
Ill be around on LINE and lurking here. I sense that Archimedes' story in black crusade is drawing to a conclusion so Im going to finish that one out.

So is the game over? No. Do I have plans for it? Yes. But I cant do any quality work like this. The PC's and you guys don't deserve that.
The best I can say is extended hiatus. This has been a difficult decision for me and not a pleasant announcement to write out. Im Sorry Guys.

Heath, it takes a lot to not just realize when you're burning out, but to voice it and make it known so that you can take the time you need.

You definitely don't need to apologize for that.

My interest here has been waning as well; not as a player in this game because Lucius is one of my favorite PCs I have ever roleplayed, but just in general. There's a lot happening at home and work, as there is with all of us, and I have let it take away from spending some time posting on here as I had in the past.

These things happen, and I completely understand extended hiatus - hell, look at Bastards.

Anyways, I truly hope things start to level out for you so that you can find some peace. I will definitely be here when that happens.

Very sad to hear about your situation and condition.

Take the time you need.

I wish you the best, Sylphilis, and my thoughts are with you as I, and I will presume 'we', await your return.

In my experience continuing when you're already struggling will end things more surely than a break. And real rest and recuperation is the only way to get your mojo back. Take the time you need - that above all - and if and when you start feeling like you're more interested start slow with the things that only depend on you - the video games and the guitar. When you've got a rhythm going there you'll start to feel that itch to continue this story. When your creative juices are overflowing, then maybe it's time to pick this back up.

No worries, mate. It's a shame that RL has such an impact on us - to the point we can't do the things that are supposed to take us out of it for just a bit to try and relax.

This game has had a huge impact on me over the last 10+ years. I remember flailing about trying to find a way to play because there were no RL games near me. It took fumbling through three or four different obscure sites before I randomly met Jeff at one and he brought me over to this community. I've loved being in the community and the banter, while having this wee adventure cooking in the background. I've especially enjoyed everyone's dedication to their characters and backgrounds. I think at one point I was in four games at once, but now this is my last. With it winding down, it looks like it's an end of an era for me also. I'd hate to let Hydrako lurk out in the dark and collect dust, but perhaps a glorious death wasn't his destiny.

Take all the time you need to recover. Burnout is tough to crack, and is different for everyone, but the struggle is always real.

It's been great guys.

Andrew,

Don't you fuckin' dare bail on the site. I won't hear it! I won't allow it! If I have to bring back the Bastards just to get you back in a game, then that's what I will do.

Don't make me bail out. I'll do it, you sonofabitch!